The Lenten Saga: Day 11

Caterpillar was on POINT today!

We had a very insightful series of conversations based off the chapters in the challenge, as well as the chapters in Job. So we had to make sure that the first 3 chapters (along with the first 3 chapters in Job) were read, or known, to make this a worthy conversation. And we all did. It was interesting in how the devil could not do anything without God's permission, and that God was willing to let the devil do everything short of killing Job. There was a lot of spirit in that room at church today. And I felt it. As my Lenten journey continues, I am really learning more about myself. What I can tolerate, and what I can not. Well, stuff that I need to work on. So far I have not broken my Lenten vows, and I feel really good that I have made it this far. I honestly thought I would have croaked by now.

This is no ordinary Lenten challenge year for me. This was the year that I said to myself that I was going to take it to the extreme! And see what happens. I have been tempted so much since Ash Wednesday, yet somehow, I keep winning. I guess it is because I keep praying whenever I feel tempted to give in. I just close my eyes, pray, silently, and sometimes out loud. I seriously ask myself, if it is worth breaking Lent just to satisfy a selfish indulgence, and everytime I try to find an excuse, I find another reason to to contrary, and I end up not giving in.

But it is hard sometimes... It is hard, because temptation is everywhere... It is out in full force, working in the shadows, in the still of the nights, in the quiet tremors of my sleep. Even in the calmness of the daytime, looking through the glass at work towards the West and towards the North, where a part of me still lies. The urge to break, surge, but it goes away. As long as I resist, it goes away.

I knew it was not going to be easy, but neither is being a Christian. So much challenge. Jesus never said it was going to be a cakewalk! You will be hated on, by the devil, by the world, and you will be tested and tempted to give into your desires. But Jesus also said that if the world hates me, know that the world has hated Jesus first. Just as Jesus carried the cross to take upon him the sins of mankind, so must I challenge myself to resist the temptations that are all around me. It is up to me to take up my cross... and follow Jesus.

On the flipside of things, it looks like I have zoned in on my future home! It is a nice 3 bed 3.5 bath townhome, still in the Containment Area and closer to work!!! Which is the key for me! The subdivision is still developing which means it will be complete and great by the time I finish my mission in this area. I am still bent on my seven year battle plan, and if things happen (marriage), so be it. But if I am still single, the possibilites of my career will be endless, especially for all I want to accomplish!

Time to start making moving plans! Good thing I do not have a lot to move! But it does not hurt being ready for whats to come! These are exciting, alluring, and extremely tempting times for me! Only with patience, time, prayer, the advice of good people, can I ever stand a chance at sorting this all out correctly.

Time for me to sleep now. I have to pick up my niece tomorrow! She will be joining me at church.